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  • HAPruitt


Right now I'm working on the interior of my book. Part of that means reading through the story again (for about the seventh time). Critically examining something I've created or something about myself is not fun. I don't like analyzing my actions and output because my mind always starts wondering if they are good enough. Technically, I wonder if my efforts were correct. The thoughts never remain technical or superficial, though. They run deeper and make me believe I am not and all I do is just not good enough.

I want to be good enough. With editing I want to be good enough so that no one tosses my book aside because the grammatical errors are just too glaring. I want to do this big, scary project that God enlisted me for without messing it all up and disappointing Him.

Then the reminder of this whole endeavor being God's plan reassures me that I am not enough and I do not have to be enough. This book (and anything I do at God's direction) does not depend on my ability. It depends on God's ability and He is able to do anything He chooses to do. That means I need to stop listening to my wandering thoughts and instead listen to God's direction. I am not, but God is good enough to finish what He started, keep His promises, and remind me that although I am not able, I am deeply loved and valued by Him.

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